I am verbally constipated. And… TOUGH MUDDER!!!

I am constipated. I am so full of ideas and events and awesomeness that I don't know where to begin.

Crap.

No. Not real crap. I'm just in deep Doo Doo because I wait too long to use my my blog to expell my smelly mind-stuff that now I don't know how to begin.

Hmm... Well I guess I'll start with this:

But first... a DISCLAIMER. I am not a doctor. I am not a nurse. I am not affiliated with any sort of health industry. You are reading this blog with the full knowledge that Pilialoha K. Nathaniel is not authorized by any school, institution or government to give health and medical advise. If you follow any advise in this blog it is at your own discretion and at your own risk. 

Okay? 

Nod if you agree. If you read anything past this paragraph that means you have nodded and you agree.

So… in order to discuss ANY of the newest happenings I first have to back track. And ince we're talking about poo let's talk about mud. Specifically MUD RACES. More specifically:

TOUGH MUDDER!!!

Before TOUGH MUDDER!!! Ben Thomas, Christina Black, Adam Kolinski, Me and Jason Yarusi

If you know me or/and follow me on Facebook you also know that four awesome people and myself did this PHENOMENALLY DIFFICULT mud race. It was crazy.

Crazy.

So crazy that I think my brain went numb in the Mason Container ice-bath and I just couldnʻt write about it. I couldn't think about it. Even now I tremble with delighted FEAR at the prospect of ever doing it again. (October 11-12 2014 is the next date!!!)

So that brain-numbing sphincter-clencing TOUGH MUDDER was so… Well… Let me take you through some of my favorite parts of the course. Letʻs go with:

HAPPY NATHANIELʻS TOP TEN TOUGH MUDDER HIGHLIGHTS

or better know as…

HOW PILI GOT HER ASS KICKED!

10. The Running. I am going to admit it here. I was the last one to EVERY obstacle. Between my timidness, my lack of stamina, and my need to conserve energy I just SUCKED when it came to pumping myself up to run. Even though my teammates kept up a good pace I could not stay in time with them. I donʻt like admitting this. I trained for three months to get myself into running shape. 

9. The Cold. I hate being cold. I knew this was coming. I thought I could handle it. By the end of the race I could barely hold my beer because I was shaking so hard.  

8. The Shower. Almost the hardest part of the whole thing. ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!! After three HARD hours in crazy obstacle-course land I had to wash off in an ICY shower.

7. Fatigue. I not only trained to run, I also trained my body to take the hardships that was dealt in the TOUGH MUDDER… at least that is what I thought. I really felt like the weak link. I did not have the massive strength needed to really be a key player. 

6. Funky Monkey. Yeah… this obstacle is basically a set of Monkey Bars on ACID. I made it to the first bar and slipped off. Regular monkey bars are hard enough as it is… add wet mud. Yeah. 

5. Arctic Enema. Imagine jumping in to a pool filled with ice cubes and muddy water. Imagine swimming though this pool and now dunk your head under the ice-cube-water for three seconds and then swim for another ten. That wasn't the hard part. The hard part was trying to climb out when your entire body is screaming. 

4. All those Walls. The short ones. The tall ones. Ranging from 5ft to 30ft (It looked like 30ft to me!) Wow. There is just no way. 

3. Electroshock Therapy. 10,000 VOLTS. Nothing more needs to be said. 

2. Mud Mile. This is toward the end of the course. It includes HILLS OF MUD, WALLS OF MUD, DEEP POOLS OF COLD MUDDY WATER and MUD. 

1. Running. I know I mentioned this before. The running KILLED ME.

After the MUD!!!!

And…

I would do it all again. Why? Because I FINISHED. I COMPLETED ALL THE OBSTACLES. I did not "Opt out". I did not freeze and cry at the top of the 30ft tower. (It was probably closer to 15ft) I JUMPED OFF!!! It was exhilarating! It felt good to overcome my fears. It felt amazing to feel PAIN. To feel like I could fall on my face at any moment. To feel angry at myself for not pushing harder.

How did I do this? Their names are Jason, Christina, Ben, Adam and the countless people I ran with who helped push me along by running along side me, helping me up, showing me where to go and allowing me to help them as well.

I know in the beginning I said I was the weak link… I was. BUT I STILL SUPPORTED MY TEAM and in TURN THEY SUPPORTED ME. This blog is for you guys. Thank you so much for showing me that I can do these crazy things. Thank you for giving me a shoulder to lean on… or climb on… in this case.

This is also for all of my family members who are living HEALTHY LIVES and supporting the OHANA CHALLENGE! You know who you are…  For you all who donʻt or havenʻt made the time… please do. We donʻt really know what goes on beyond this life. So live your life like its the only one you are ever going to get. In Health and WITH LOVE!

And this is for my Grandma. When I was eighteen, she was given SIX MONTHS to live. With the help of FAMILY, FRIENDS, STUBBORNNESS and straight UP healthier living… she has fought to be HEALTHY for her FAMILY. Thank you again to everyone for your support of our HEALTHY GRANDMA (or Aunty, Mom, Sister… depending…) 

I love you all! Please leave a note in the comments if you have ever been in any sort of race… muddy or otherwise!!!

Hereʻs to HEALTH and MUD!

Happy Nathaniel