On Aloha in the Middle East

My Family and Friends, My beautiful courageous cousin from Hawai'i, Lia Kamana, is studying abroad in Israel right now. She has been there for the last two semesters and has continued to learn and persevere through all that she has come across, the good and the bad.

Here is a picture of my cousin in Petra, Jordan:

With the lastest reports of violence in the Middle East I want to stretch my arms out to my brave cousin, give her the warmest hug and grab her by the scruff and drag her home. But that's because I'm much older than her and I remember when she and my little sister, Leimaile, played as toddlers ... 

Truly... I am afraid for her. 

But that fear stems from the unknown. I do not know what she is going through. I do not know what it is like to live in Israel. All I can hope for is that my cousin is surrounded by good people with loving hearts who know what a special person they have amongst them. 

To Lia... You have grown into a powerful world traveling woman. Please be careful. Please keep on smiling and giving that ALOHA spirit that you so eloquently write about.

To my friends and family... PLEASE LIVE WITH ALOHA!!! Please read and please pray for those who seek violence. It is not the way. Please pray for those who have lost their lives through violence. May their families know peace. Please pray for my cousin that she may show people ... Even if it is just ONE person ... The meaning of ALOHA. 

Love you Lia. Be safe and live with Aloha.

Happy Nathaniel


Please read Below:

"Aloha in the Middle East" From the Facebook page of Lia Kamana:

"Just a thought, I normally don't do this, but I had to get it out: 

This is the first time in the duration of my 6 months in Israel that I have ever woken up and seriously said to myself “I wish I was home.” Never in my life have I witnessed so much hate directed towards others due to religion or race more than in the past 2 days. Also, never in my life have I ever feared for my own safety due to religion and race more than in the last 2 days, and in my 21 years of life I have experienced hate due to both and this has been the worst.

VIOLENCE IS NOT GOING TO STOP VIOLENCE… when are people going to realize that?! If anything productive is ever going to be accomplished, everyone, regardless of religion, regardless of race needs to act intelligently, thoughtfully, and in the way we all strive to live.

Regardless of religion, we all strive to live like how God, Yahweh, Allah, the Heavenly Father – names don’t matter – we are all striving to live like how our CREATOR would want us to live.

I don’t know about you, but the G-D I know, would not want his people to be killing one another, he would not want us killing our brothers and sisters. We are all equal in the eyes of GOD and we are all his children.

Leviticus 19:18 “Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against anyone among your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the LORD.

Mark 12:31 “Love your neighbor as yourself. There is no commandment greater than these.”

Romans 13:10 “Love does no harm to a neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law. “

Proverbs 24:17 “Rejoice not when thine enemy falleth, and let not thine heart be glad when he stumbleth.”

I have faith in this world and the people within it. I have faith that peace can be reached. But this can only happen when people start thinking and acting with intelligence.

GOD knows all and in the end, when it comes down to it, he knows who truly lived in his way. So please, I ask of everyone to start thinking intelligently, to open your minds, open your hearts, not just to those who are similar, but also to those who are different. As we say in Hawaii, speak with ALOHA, act with ALOHA, share with ALOHA. Lets stop the violence, stop the hate, and start living in the ALOHA way. I know that we, children of GOD, can do this... and GOD knows we can do it too.

God Bless and Aloha"

-Lia Kamana

Grandmas Strength: The fourth part of my Memories of Grandma.

My Family and Friends… I am really tired. These journals are hard. Every moment I delve back into the memories I feel weak, ripped raw and my poor computer receives a Hilo Rain flood of tears. But after I put the final edit and find a few pictures and click the “post” button I feel this overwhelming sense of gratitude. I am thankful that I am here and that I can share my stories of my Grandma. Thank you for reading. If you haven't already… check out the first three blogs in this series of memories. 

I know I said the title of this piece would be Grandmaʻs House or maybe Grandmaʻs Love… but itʻs my blog and I can change things if I want to. And… after I started writing I realized that the title didnʻt fit. I will save that title for another day and another story. Instead this chapter will be titled…

...

Grandmas Strength

...

I really just want to crawl into bed right now. I want to curl up next to Jason and close my eyes and…

APRIL FOOLS!!! Itʻs about 1:30 AM on April 1st, 2014. I canʻt sleep. I close my eyes anyway and wake up a few hours later to the sound of my phone ringing. I look at my iPhone and a picture of my Grandma and Grandpa, smiling, pops up on my phone. Itʻs my Grandma calling to tell me this has just been one big April Fools Day Joke. I laugh and tell Grandma, “Good one.”

This wish is definitely foolish. 

Instead of foolish wishing… back to March 15th, 2014:

…

I let go of Jason and search for my sister. It is almost time to pick up my Dad and Brother from the airport. 

I donʻt know how I am going to tell them. I donʻt know how I am going to tell my little brother that our Grandmother is gone. Passed. Expired. What words will I use? How will it come out? This is a memory that I will create for him that will be burned into his memory and how can I possibly do that to my little brother.

Then my Mom walks out of my Grandfathers room. 

My Mom has just told her Father that his wife has passed away. My Mom had the strength to deliver to my Grandfather that painful, soul-shattering truth. In that moment I am faced with the incredible strength and powerful love of my Mom. I realize that as hard as it will be for me to tell my brother… telling someone… telling your Dad that his wife, the woman he chose to love and cherish… the woman who cared for him… the woman who gave him his children… telling your Dad that his wife has died…

I cannot even fathom finding those words within my heart. But she did. I heard her. I will never forget the love and strength my Mom had in that moment.

My Mom walks out of Grandpaʻs room and I let her know that Jason, Leimaile and I are going to get Dad and Kepa. We discuss it and decide it is best for us to tell them at the airport and drive directly up to the hospital after.

All of a sudden tensions rise in the house. Someone has posted on Facebook. Everyone is LIVID. Not everyone knows. My BROTHER doesnʻt KNOW!!! I can only hope that the post was after he got on the plane and that he doesnʻt check when he lands. 

If you have ever been on the receiving end of a scolding by Grandma on Facebook… you understand what the words TOUGH LOVE mean. She was brutal. And we were too. Aunty Lorie called everyone to try to get this taken off Facebook. 

It was a very bad mistake that was soon rectified. 

A few more things are discussed and we are all look… lonely. In these first few moments I think we were all alone in our individual loss. The loss of Grandmaʻs love left us all cold and wandering. I saw that in the depths of us all. I felt it in my heart. Even with the strength of our family around us… there is a sort of loneliness in grief.

I give my Mom a hug and kiss. I look to Kaeo. Both he and my Mom with the help of Aunty Lorie, Uncle Scotty and Kristian will care for Grandpa. I want to care for my Grandpa as well. I want to go up to the hospital to wake up Grandma…

Instead, I hand the keys to Jason so that he can drive and with Leimaile we head to the Airport. We will rush over to the hospital after.

It takes five minutes to drive to the airport from Grandmas house and we are early. I speak to my cousin Daniel. Daniel canʻt speak. He can hardly form words and our call is short. I speak with my Aunty Kathy Babayan. She will tell that side of the family as well as our friends at Hale Lokahi, one of the churches that my Grandmother loved. My eyes hurt as I scroll down my contacts list looking for people to call. 

Kepa texts: “Weʻve just landed.”

I look at Leimaile and ask Jason to drop us off at the front of the airport. I walk toward the receiving area. I was in such a daze that I donʻt remember where Leimaile went in these first few moments. I feel strangely alone. I look up and see my Dad strut up to me with a big smile.

He looks at me and I think he knows. He hugs me and I tell him immediately. 

“Grandma passed away this morning.” 

His everlasting always smiling face falls as he gathers me in his arms. I want to cry on my Daddyʻs shoulder… but then I remember the strength of my Mom. She held on until she told her father. 

Over my fathers shoulder, I see this tall thinly muscular long-haired Hawaiian bound over to us. I let go of my Dad and put a smile on my face. Kepa is so excited and happy and bright. I was to live in his world. A world where our Grandmother is still with us. A world of light. I look at my Dad as Kepa bends down to kiss my belly. In my eyes I think my Dad sees what I am trying to convey. 

I will tell Kepa.

Leimaile appears and we talk and walk to a more secluded spot. Kepa raps on about lots of things… but I canʻt concentrate on anything except him. He throws his things onto a bench and he finally looks at me.

“Kepa…”

“No…”

More words are said... but words really do not matter in this crushing moment. Leimailes arms wrap around our brother from behind as he keels forward into my arms. I feel my little brother as if he was the little baby I raised. I feel the little boy sob in the heart of the man he has become. My little brother breaks in my arms.

My Dad wraps his arms around us all and we are all kids again. 

…

Tuesday, April 2nd, 2014. 12:08 AM… I am slowly coming to the realization that my Grandmother has died. Slowly. I was there and so were you. You saw her. She was still warm. Still soft. So much so that I thought she could have been sleeping. I think Iʻve put it into my head that she is just sleeping. She will wake up and call me... 

But it is no longer April first and I am not a fool. I must put foolish thoughts aside and have the strength to carry on. Strength my Grandmother would have wanted me to have.

Earlier today, as Jason and I were driving to our ultrasound appointment, I almost broke. I looked down at my ever-expanding belly and I began to tear. Our baby will never know my Grandmother. Her voice. Her hands. Her smile. Her amazing capacity to LOVE. Baby will never know how it feels to be held by her. To have her tell a story of her youth. To have her smile that brilliant smile. Baby will never know how strong my Grandmother was.

… IF I do not teach.

Our Grandmother taught us all. She taught my Mom and her sisters and in turn I was also taught.

I must teach our baby how to tell a story.

I must teach our baby to SMILE just to show the world your gratitude for LIFE.

I must teach our baby how to have an OPEN, LOVING HEART.

I must teach our baby that HANDS were made for CREATING.

I will teach our baby what it means to be STRONG.

Strong like my Grandma.

One of my favorite pictures of our Grandmother.

Have Strength, my Friends and Family. 

Aloha,

Happy Nathaniel

PS... Here is something for your hands to create... It goes great with the Sweet Bread Recipe I posted a few days back. 

PORTUGUESE BEAN SOUP

2 cups red kidney beans - canned or dried
1-2 lbs. ham hock or canned ham - cut into bite sized pieces
1 medium round onion, chopped fine
2 cloves garlic, chopped fine
1 stalk celery, chopped fine
2 quarts water or more if needed
2 to 2 potatoes, cut into 1 inch cubes
1 large carrot, cut into 1 inch cubes
salt and pepper to taste
1 tsp allspice
1 can tomato sauce or paste
1 cup macaroni

If using dried beans, wash and soak beans in water over nite.

Boil ham hocks in water (2 quarts) until tender. Take ham out and cut into bite sized pieces. Put back in pot and add onions, celery, garlic, beans, tomato sauce, allspice, salt and pepper and simmer for 15-20 minutes. Add carrots and potatoes. Cook for about 15 minutes then add macaroni. Cook until macaroni is cooked. If seasoning is needed, add. Any type of vegetables may be added.

When using canned ham, and/or canned beans, boil everything together.

A Grandmotherʻs Deposit: My Grandmother is AWESOME.

A Deposit on life.

I was just having a discussion on Deposits. Not the kind you put in the bank... Nope. I'm talking about the sort that cost you money. When a business asks for a deposit, that business is basically making sure that their investment of time and money into YOU and your project is not wasted. They are making sure that you will use their services and will not backout. Most businesses that require deposits put time and effort into you... Time and effort that you may not see or realize.

On the flip side... Make sure that when you are paying a deposit that you 1. Have read the fine print on the contract, 2. Are absolutely sure that you will use those services 3. Make sure that the deposit amount is fair and reasonable and 4.Did I mention READ the contract.

And so you read the contract that states that the deposit is the property of the business. You sign that contract saying that you will put down a deposit of X amount of dollars as good faith that you the customer will follow through and use the services that the business is preparing to offer you. You pay that business your deposit.

So... All life threatening and natural disasters aside... If you, the client, decide not to use the service you put a deposit down on... Do you deserve to get your deposit back?

I'm actually asking.

All life threatening, acts of God and natural disasters aside... Do you think you should get your deposit back? 

AND...

Welcome to another installment of Happy Nathaniel. 

I went to an awesome wedding a few weeks back that I want to mention here and now!!! It was the wedding of two great friends, Joel Young and Lindsey Warp. May their lives be fuller and filled to the brim with happiness!

And...

That's not what I called you here for. I called you here because My Grandma is the best Grandma ever!

Speaking of deposits... This woman has deposited so much LOVE and HOPE and STRENGTH into her family. Let us do some Math on the CARING/LOVE DEPOSITS Grandma has made over the years...

Because its rude to mention a ladies age without her consent... let us use a span of roughly 60 years of KIDS: 

1 older sibling, 3 younger siblings, 1 husband (oh I love you Grandpa), 4 daughters, 13 grandchildren, 2 great-grandchildren and lets say roughly 2 dozen Hanai Kids... you know who you are!!! And thatʻs just the IMMEDIATE Family! I would be here FOREVER if I wrote down everyone that has benefited from Grandmas LOVE.

Grandma and her two oldest Grandchildren.

... Think about how much food Grandma has made for us in 60 years... There was ALWAYS food ready or ready in 10 minutes if you were hungry. 

... Think about how many hugs, kisses, spankings (hey... love hurts and you know you deserved it... you know who you are), more kisses you were given.

... Thatʻs a SHIT-LOAD of diapers in 60 years!!!

... Think about how much ti-leaf sheʻs wrapped around you to calm a fever and huli opu (tummy rubs) sheʻs given. Remember the cloth diapers (clean) she would wrap around your tummy to keep it warm.

... The house is ALWAYS OPEN.

... Grandma prays for you everyday... even if she doesnʻt particularly like you at the moment. That just means she prays harder!!!!

My family is now returning the favor. To my family...

Thank you.

I keep on hearing the sentence... "If you were here you would do the same. You would care for Grandma too."

To that I say:  Thank You For Making Me Feel Better.

To my family who ARE THERE... And you know who you are... To my family members who are staying up late and sleeping with Grandma... To my family members who have put their blood, sweat, and time into fixing the house on Lanikaula Street that WE ALL call HOME... To all my family members who have made multipule trips from the outer islands to care for OUR LADY... To my family who live their lives for family...

To my family... Here is one of Grandmas stories... When Great-Grandpa Nathaniel and Vovo got sick, Grandma took care of them. Yes... I am sure she had help... Yes... She could have done other things. She could have put Vovo and Great-Grandpa Harry in a care facility. But she didn't. She cared for her Mother and Father. 

Thank you for that Grandma. Thank you for installing... DEPOSITING... in your children and grandchildren AND GREAT-GRANDCHILDREN the power of CARE. The power of BEING THERE for your family. 

And now it is our turn. We will CARE for you, Grandma, like you cared for us. 

Thank you AGAIN and AGAIN for my Family who ARE PRESENT. Thank you for my Family that send their prayers every day. Thank you for you.

Thank you Grandma.

I love you,

Your Grandchild, Child, Niece, Sister, Cousin, Friend...

Happy Nathaniel

RANDOM FAMILY PICTURES IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER...